The Cord

Loss is a strange thing. For a period of time the world loses color. Voices blur. The heart beats in your chest . A hollow bell. It hurts. Pain from the inside. Everything else is numb. Vision is a black and white kaleidoscope. A gray scrim.

A friend of mine just lost her son in a senseless accident. She lost her husband to a debilitating illness less than a year ago. Both tragic, unseemly, untimely.

So. Is this just random? Just s--t happens? Is there a reason? A purpose? Now seems the time to ask these questions because thinking about them all the time is too difficult. At least for me. So. Is there a lesson? Is there meaning? If this is our earth-school, do we need to learn about loss to appreciate the now?

My brother lost his son a few years ago. His mother almost didn’t recover. How could she? It doesn’t bear thinking about. By extension I think of my own son. My daughter. How much I miss them. How as a mother your heart never quite stops aching when you are not with your children. I think it was my own mother who said it was as if there is an invisible cord attaching heart to heart. Does that cord ever break? I think not. Certainly not with separation. Not even with loss.

I know there is something more. That’s all I know. So I’m sending comfort. Hoping that’s possible at this time. Sending.