Madness and Magic

Henry James said, "We work in the dark—we do what we can—we give what we have. Our doubt is our passion and our passion is our task. The rest is the madness of art."

So feeling a little mad, using the white rabbit as a reference, I have made a dive back into writing. It never ceases to amaze me how much joy it gives me. As the words start to move across the page, it’s as if light moves outward from my core and suffuses me.

Last week, after several meetings back with my writer’s group, I read them an excerpt from my YA novel. I had not looked at it for a year. I was terrified to actually do this, but the anticipation of their critique was much more horrifying than the reality. They were kind but gave some very helpful suggestions. I have been stuck for awhile. Not knowing whether to move forward or let it go. I had queried several agents over several years about several manuscripts… and those that did respond, passed. Was it the queries? Was it the topics? Was it…drum roll…the writing?

I had become so immobilized by the wall of rejection that I was having a hard time getting on with it. I have been writing for most of my life but seriously for about 17 years. To be fair to myself, I spent many of those years, first writing novel one and then researching the business of how to get published. Oh yeah, and learning how to use a computer so I could type my manuscript. What I learned aside from “there are no rules” (well, almost none) could easily fill another novel

So I got the critiques and it was now my task to implement the ideas that made sense to me. When you hear the same thing from several writers whose work you respect, you take heed. That’s your clue. Your starting point. So I sat at my computer and asked myself, “Do you really want to do this again? The rewriting, the polishing, the researching agents, the submissions?” Because it is a royal pain, let me tell you.

I thought and thought and thought, staring at the computer. Well, I must be that mad artist because I couldn’t think of another single thing I would rather do. That’s the magic part.