The Algorithm of Events

Perhaps it’s the reading I have been doing lately. The thing is, it has made me think. How do events shape our lives? Intentional events, certainly, but also unintentional ones. Random events.

An intentional event would be say a wedding, a party, lunch with a friend, a trip. We expect certain outcomes and often those outcomes occur in some expected form. Intentional or planned events shape our lives, more or less, in expected ways. We see loved ones, we get to wear a pretty dress, we have a good meal, good conversation.

So what interests me the most are the random events. A chance meeting on the street, attending a seminar where you hear a philosophy that changes your life, encountering a stranger in a class who becomes a lifelong friend because you happened to introduce yourself. And you almost didn’t. Tragic, unexplainable happenings that alter your trajectory.

Every event changes us whether intentional or not. The changes may be minuscule or major. An example for me would be something that happened many years ago. I happened to read in the newspaper about an acting class being held at a local theatre. (Just reading a newspaper at that time for me was something of an anomaly. I did not read it on a regular basis.) I was terrified at the thought. I had two small children, I was pathologically shy and I lived a substantial distance from the location of the class. I easily could have passed. But I did not. As a result I met my best friends in the world and satisfied a lifelong passion. Was it random? You could argue that there was intention and I put it out into the universe and the universe answered. But why did I happen to read that newspaper? That day?

You often hear, “Everything happens for a reason.” Or “It was supposed to happen.” Really? So here’s the thing. I do believe in intention. It does work. But which is more powerful, fate or happenstance? Is there such a thing as universal intention for us? Is there such a thing as fate? Would it benefit us to know? Interesting questions, yes? 

FALLING TOGETHER- FEBRUARY 2017 BOOK SELECTION

Marisa de los Santos, author of this month’s book selection is a favorite. I reviewed a book of hers in June of 2015 called, The Precious One. I go back to her novels again and again because of the excellent writing.

Falling Together is a novel about relationships in general and friendship in particular. Three college students, Cat, Pen and Will, form a bond of intense friendship. Due to circumstances, they separate geographically but not emotionally. A series of events bring them back in the sphere of each other’s lives in unexpected ways. The story is unique but beyond that, de los Santos has an uncanny and unflinchingly true eye for observation. While you don’t always like the characters and their reactions to situations and to one another, you appreciate the events as uncontrived and true to human nature.

Another facet this novel explores is how people change and grow over time. It shows how first impressions can be totally erroneous and actions misconstrued. People are rarely just one thing, evil, happy, asinine…whatever.  The evolution of learning about another human being can enrich us, be painful, illuminating and surprising. Good stuff.

Happy Valentine’s!